Are you not able to have as much sex as you want now that you are parents?
If you saw yourself frowning at the title and exclaimed “What? Do couples really have sex after a child?” then this is the right article for you. It might seem impossible to you now – the thought of sex is not anywhere in your priority list. And yet, here we are talking about how to find time for it!
Pause for a moment and think why you are not having sex any more. After a child, the reasons for the drop in sex life are plenty:
- You fear it might be painful
- One of the spouses is not yet “ready”
- You lose your sex drive
- You are conscious of the changes in your body
- Sex doesn’t feel good any more
If you are facing any of these problems, then read Has Your Sex Life Dropped After a Baby? and Sex Life After Childbirth for a better understanding of the subject. It discusses these reasons in depth and provides tips to get over them.
Why Don’t We Have Time For Sex After A Baby?
We deal with a very different kind of excuse for not having sex in this article – lack of time! That seems obvious, doesn’t it? You are doing a lot of things now – taking care of the child, running the house, managing work life (if you are working), feeding your child in the night – where is the time for sex? Forget about sex, where is time to even have some romance with your spouse right? You consider yourself lucky if you are able to pee for as long as you want, and here we are talking about romance and sex. Okay, first things first. Romance should come before sex. So go ahead and read our Top 10 Tips to Sneak Romance After A Baby. Now, how do you find time for sex? Hope the following tips will help you!
Tips To Make Time For Sex After Having A Baby
- Schedule some time: We know that sounds very unromantic and un-spontaneous. But sometimes this is the only thing that works. Both of you are busy. If you do not set aside time, you would always put sex aside. So work out some time, even if it is once or twice in a week
- Stay connected: One of the problems couples face after baby is a lack of communication (other than discussions about the baby). Make sure you guys talk about non-baby matters. About your worries, joys and even mundane stuff. But stay connected. If you know each other’s feeling well, it can flow naturally to romance and sex
- Take it slow: We mentioned before how you might be worried about weight, pain etc. Keep these worries aside. You are, after all with your partner. Take things slow. You do not have to go the entire way the first time itself. Make sure both of you are comfortable and on the same page
- Rest: Most moms are so exhausted by night that all they want to do is sleep. To make sure this does not happen, try to sneak in few naps during the day
- Understand baby’s sleeping patterns: You obviously do not want a situation where you have finally found some time to have sex and your baby wakes up in between crying! Find your baby’s sleeping patterns and pick a time when you are sure he/she won’t bother you do sometime
- Focus on foreplay: After childbirth, sex might not be as pleasurable for the women as before. The drive for it might be less as well. So men, warm up and focus a lot on foreplay. A lot. If you want it more, you need to make it more pleasurable for your lady!
- Have fun: Does lack of privacy bother you? Do you find it weird to do it in the same room where the little one sleeps? If you do have an empty house otherwise, sneak in to the living room or wash room or even kitchen to have some fun
- Do not forget how good sex is: Yes, baby is your first priority now. But that does not mean that you forget about yourself and your spouse, or turn a blind eye to your bodily needs!
For more on this topic, please refer to 8 Amazing Sex Secrets For New Parents and Sex Life For New Dads.
Remember, a healthy sexy life leads to a happier you. If you are happier, you are better equipped to take of your child. If you take care of your child better, you get happier kids! See the connection? So do not say no to sex!
