A Mom Is A Mom. Why You Should Never Regret A C-Section

There are broadly two ways you can deliver a baby – normal delivery and C-section. The very fact that you call a vaginal delivery “normal” makes the C-section feel a bit “abnormal” and “unnatural”. So the problem starts with the nomenclature, not just with mindsets.

As many C-section moms would know, the scars of the operation, although painful, lessens in comparison to the kind of ridicule one has to bear for not “opting for” the more “natural” and “healthy” delivery. What all of us need to understand is that a majority of the C-section deliveries happen so under doctor’s advice, when there is a medical reason not to attempt normal delivery.
Of course, there are some who chose it electively, meaning they opt for C-section because they do not want to go for normal delivery. And this is fine too. A pregnant woman’s comfort and preferences are extremely important, because, well, it is her body, her baby, so her choice.
All these are reasonable and logical. But for nay-sayers, logic and reason do not matter. They firmly believe that since they had a vaginal delivery, they are somehow more of a mom than you, who had a C-section delivery. Take any social forum, and you would see more people taking sides on this debate than voice a neutral “a mom is a mom, how does the mode of delivery matters” comment.
Here are the top 5 comments we hear about C-section.

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1. Oh! You had such a luxury! I had hours of labor and a painful delivery
2. You are selfish!
3. You must have opted for C-section because you are scared of pain, right?
4. You won’t bond with the baby after a C-section delivery
5. You had a C-section? Oh, then you haven’t really given birth

All of them are ridiculous, to put it in a mild way. Let us pick each of these myths and bust them

1. 1. C-Section Deliveries are a luxury: C-Section deliveries are awesome in the sense that medical science has found a way for a mother to give birth to a child in a safe way when vaginal delivery was not a possibility. However, this does not mean C-sections are a luxury. There are in fact higher risks to a C-section birth because, for starters, it is a surgery. Although it is not common, surgical complications do happen during C-section, just like any other surgery. And even after the C-section, there is a chance of infection, stitches not healing and so on. Sorry to disappoint you, but this does not sound like luxury to us
   2. C-Section moms are selfish: If the child is in breech position, how is it selfish to go for a C-section? If the fetus is in distress, how is it selfish to go for a C-section? If the mom is diabetic, or is physically incapable of vaginal delivery, how is it selfish to go for a C-section? Long story short, the best mode of delivery is the one that ensures that the mom and child are healthy. If vaginal delivery does not offer that, then C-section is the option to go for. There is no “selfishness” involved here

1. C-Section Moms have not endured pain: Yeah, there is no pain involved in C-section. There is no pain involved walking around with a horizontal deep cut across your lower abdomen. There is no pain involved when up to six layers of stitches in your belly are healing. It is very difficult to understand the smugness of some who pretend that only they have known the “real pain” as they had a vaginal delivery. With all due respect, the amount of pain is not the criteria for how good of a mother you are. There is pain involved in both kinds of delivery. One during, one afterwards. There is no need to send a C-section mom on a guilt trip to satisfy your ego
2. C-Section Moms and children do not bond well: Err, this one is a bit baffling. What has bonding got to do with the mode of delivery? And yet, this is a myth that is plastered all over the media. After a C-section delivery, moms are a bit drowsy due to the effect of anesthesia. They cannot really “sit up” and cuddle the baby immediately after birth. This probably is the reason for this myth. But then again, bonding is not about how soon the mom can sit or stand holding the baby. Also, research (by NHS no less) clearly says there is absolutely no relation between delivery and bonding
3. C-Section Moms haven’t really given birth: C-section involves someone cutting through 6 layers of skin and other tissues and pulling out a tiny human being through a relatively small fissure made in your lower abdomen. If that does not count as “giving birth”, we do not know what does!

So, dear C-section mom, you have not failed as a mother. You are not less of a mother. You carried a little miracle inside you for nine months. You went through a major operation. You have stitches and you have scars. And most importantly, you have a healthy baby in your arms. Do not get disheartened if someone says something hurtful. You are bigger than that. While this entire write up is defensive, we urge you – you do not have to defend your choice and explain why you had to go through a C-section as though that will make the nay-Sayers respect you more. It won’t. Let them believe what they want. You are and will be a rock star mom!