Unlike when you were young and had a load of things that you wanted to achieve and do, if we asked you what you want now, the answer would probably be “to be happy”. But happiness does not come easy, not at all when you are parents. It requires some effort, some let going of things, being mentally strong, and a lot of passion and commitment of staying happy to lead a fulfilling, happy life. As parents, everyday is a battle, from feeding to sleeping to studies and teaching values, manners and cultures; and happy parents do all this (and even more) without getting frazzled or losing the grip on the situation. Let us take you through things that happy parents just Don’t Do!
12 Things That Happy Parents Don’t Do
They don’t preach
Happy parents understand that preaching all the time at the top of their voices will only impede their child’s growth while being a good friend to them will facilitate their growth and development. They take the suggestion route, unlike the parents who yell and scream at their kids commanding them to behave in a certain way.
They don’t expect perfection and consistency
Happy parents know that kids are, after all, kids. They will be good and obedient one time and at others they will sound rebellious and unpredictable – and that is how they learn. If kids would be predictable all the times, parenting would lose its sheen. Kids are and should be allowed and encouraged to make mistakes, learn and grow.
They don’t jump to conclusions
So children do run into messes just like we adults. But happy parents do not base opinions or judgement about their children so quickly! They take time to listen to their kids with an unbiased mind, and understand that a child is a mess because something must have gone wrong somewhere. They take time to understand their behavior and concerns and take the patient, positive method to solve the issue in hand. An incident of misbehavior does not define their child for the happy parents.
They don’t harass the child physically
A happy parent is wise enough to know that physical abuse on the context of disciplining a child is the worst strategy with no positive outcome. Slapping or hitting the kids is the worst kind of parenting technique, and happy parents never resort to negative physical contact. Instead, they believe in rewarding the child when he does a good job, but do not deter their child’s development with physical harassment.
They don’t forget to cuddle
Happy parents understand the value of close physical contact, ad never forget to cuddle their kids – even when they are in the midst of a crucial time. They love their kids and they show it – a kiss here, a pat there, a hug now, a ruffle then. They understand how these small gestures of love make their bonds grow stronger, and help the kids to be affectionate adults. Kids, on the other hand, feel loved and safe with these small love gestures.
They don’t compare
You compare things, not kids! Happy parents do not raise their kids for superficial goals like grades and medals! They know their kids are worth more and beyond these materialistic measures of success and so raise their kids to help them meet the challenges of life undeterred and live a fulfilling life. They have the eyes to look deeper into their child and do not end up comparing their kids in the terms of the world.
They don’t plan their child’s lives
Happy parents take their kids’ successes and failures as they come, and do not end up planning everything for their child in a neat map. Though they provide for their kids, they do not encourage them to strive off their parent’s charted maps. They let their kids earn and fight for their own life, building character and developing strongly along the way.
They don’t portray the negative values
Happy parents know and understand that they are the role models for their kids, and so teach them by examples. They do not expect their children to learn the values that they themselves do not portray. They tend to become positive influences in their lives by being positive examples and refrain from displaying negative values thus being efficient role models for their kids.
They don’t just live for kids
Happy parents understand that they are humans before they are parents. So they do make some time off from parenting and focus on themselves. They give space and take their own space – to pursue an interest, to meet people or to simply relax. Happy parents are always happy individuals first.
They don’t command power
Happy parents do not try to gain ‘power’ over their kids’ lives. They understand that their kids are unique and have individual tastes and preferences, and you cannot win them with power; they need to be won through love and respect. Power is corrupt, and happy parents very well understand it.
They don’t claim to know everything
Happy parents let their kids learn through their experiences and help them in the process. Rarely would you find a happy parent who claims to know everything, as they know that with changing times everything else changes too. Infact, happy parents are keen to look at life from a newer perspective and are smart to say that no one possibly knows everything.
Every parent knows and will agree that parenting is a tough and challenging gig, and yet is the most important project of their lives. As kids chart their future, parents need to ensure that they follow a rightful path, and who else than happy parents can set right examples. In the process of raising kids, do not leave out your happiness yet! Do read our article on 8 steps to be a happy mom!
